Palmetto Tree Mom-- A procrastinator's blog

Why I Am Now Carrying the Camera Everywhere

2008-06-19T23:40:00.003-04:00

I was trying to explain to someone how crazy-happy I am now that I am home full time. I was telling the story of how Little Man became so angry with me because I wouldn't let him but Thomas the Train in the dishwasher when I was cleaning the kitchen. In retribution, he marched right to the center of the kitchen, sat down on the chilly tile, turned his back to me, and then proceeded with his tantrum. I couldn't believe that (as I deftly "ignored" the histrionics) I was actually smiling to myself. He was throwing a fit and I was just so happy to have this little guy bringing all of this excitement to my life.

Of course, the person I was explaining this to later looked at me as if I needed to be straitjacketed and carted off. Partially because she is a bit younger and can't see past her work to party to sleep and back to work again lifestyle. Partially because she has known me and my side of the family long enough to know that this happily-domesticated side of me is not genetic. But, the picture above says it all. Every day is so full of little surprises, bursts of candor and new pockets of personality. We were getting ready for my morning run and he just snatched the sunglasses off of my face and proceeded to ham it up. This is what makes me actually enjoy the laundry, the dishes, the diapers, the tantrums... because you never know what the next moment will bring.

Epiphany

2008-06-18T19:42:00.004-04:00

Since becoming a full-time mommy, I've always sort of ducked my head and mumbled about the fact that I have held onto my Blackberry. I felt as if it was an over-the-top luxury for someone who, at times, never even gets out of the house. What does a mommy need with a Crackberry, after all? I don't facilitate conference calls, I'm no longer on the road attending meetings while I have six other complex projects going on... what gives?

Tonight it hit me. Hubby was taking Little Man out of the tub, and as I was handing him the tube of eczema cream, I realized that it was the first time the medicine had been dispensed today. It should have been three times. My solution? Crackberry!! I set a reminder for 7am, noon, and 7pm. Thus, justifying the continuance of my addiction... and justifying my request for the 3g iPhone when we switch phone plans in a couple of months. Then, I'll just be super-cool-mommy, who can blog, take pictures, and get turn-by-turn directions on the sleekest-looking device on the planet.

See, there's always a use for everything!

To The Target Lady

2008-06-05T00:21:00.003-04:00

Hey Lady,

Just because I brought by own bag to Target today when I needed to pick up diapers, wipes, sand toys, laundry detergent, and light bulbs it does NOT mean that I wanted to bag my own items. It also does not mean that I deserved a heavily burdened sigh or eye roll from you. What it does mean is that I have enough plastic Target bags to line my bathroom can, and therefore do not want to gather more of those wasteful pains-in-the-ass that are always flying up into the trees on Garners Ferry Road during storms. What it does mean is that I actually remembered to be a responsible Target shopper for once. I did not mean to inconvenience you and ruin your day. I wonder what else ruins your day... trees? Puppies? Smiles? How about Earth Day?

Sheesh.

I Owe Y'All A Recipe, Don't I?

2008-05-06T14:13:00.002-04:00

It's been awhile since I've posted a recipe, huh? Well, this isn't in the style of recipe, per se, but it's warm out and I would spend every second of daylight on the patio if I could, so I'll share one of our favorite things to do!

Step 1: Pick up a pack of your favorite beer and/or white wine and put it on ice by the patio table.

Step 2: Click here for a great recipe for Black and Blue Burgers, or take my route and go to Earth Fare where their meat department has them already prepared to perfection. While you are there, pick up a loaf of Cuban bread.

Step 3: Saute half an onion in butter.

Step 4: Set out some good, creamy French cheese, like fromager daffinois from The Gourmet Shop along with the portion of the bread that you won't be using for a hamburger bun, and start munching while the grill gets hot.

Step 5: Slap the blue cheese burgers on the grill and cook them to your liking (we enjoy ours medium rare).

Step 6: Place the bread, sliced for use as a hamburger bun, on the grill until lightly toasted. You don't want it to be very crunchy!

Step 7: Serve hamburgers with the sauteed onions on them, dijon mustard, and a dab of ketchup.

Mmmm! Bon appetit!

Plastic sux

2008-04-22T19:10:00.003-04:00

Hubby and I aren't really compatible when it comes to the level of caution used with certain products. I guess all Hubbies are like that because every time I talk to another Mommy it seems that she has the same sentiment.

I went out to Earth Fare and bought a Sigg bottle for Little Man this week. He loves it and giggles mischievously when he nears the bottom of his drink and then proceeds to tap the dregs out onto his tray. Yes, I know (as of today) that Playtex Sipsters are BPA-free, but it has always bothered me a little that when I get them out of their package (which apparently one needs a PhD to get through in under 5 minutes) they have that chemical-y stink. I'm sticking with Sigg. It's much cuter, anyway!

Toys R Us announced today that they are going to phase out selling bottles that contain BPA. Hubby scoffed when I told him, mumbling something about the same overreaction occurring when Teflon started being used regularly. As far as I know, though, people who have birds for pets are still cautious, and when you purchase Teflon coated pots and pans, you are still warned not to heat them on high. I told him that I will be throwing all of Little Man's bottles out and we will have to start from scratch when Number 2 comes along. Guess what? He couldn't argue with me!

So, the moral of the story is, the next time your Hubby insinuates that you are overreacting over a product warning, just wait a little while for the news to back up your claim, because, in the immortal words of Brian Williams, "If you wait long enough, a medical study will come out to validate your lifestyle anyway."

The humility of parenthood

2008-04-14T21:35:00.008-04:00

You know it's true. No matter what accomplishments we reach in life, our kids will find a way to bring us back down to earth. We saw it this weekend when Trevor Immelman won The Masters. His child did not care that Daddy was busy filling out his scorecard. He wanted Daddy. NOW. NOW! NOW!!! When it's not your kid, you let out a sort of delirious chuckle, feeling Mommy's pain as she tries to manage the situation with as much aplomb and sophistication as possible while an international feed is capturing her child's sudden burst of will. When you're not a parent, you think, "I will never let my child get away with that," or "Why is he even there?"

Hubby and I attended a party this weekend with a group of friends with whom we were regulars before parenthood descended upon us. Two of the couples were well into their third trimester of pregnancy, the rest were already lined up for the ice luge.* We stood in close proximity to the preggos, chatting about the weeks ahead of them. The wives, of course, were serene and glowing and everything one would expect from one who is between the barfing stage and the oh-God-I-can't-even-get-up-from-the-sofa-on-my-own stage. And the husbands, as one who has been through it once or twice would expect, were absolutely clueless. Two standout quotes from the Dads-to-be:

1) "Having a baby isn't going to make me miss out on anything."

2) "When my mother-in-law gets here after the baby is born I'm hitting the bars."

I could have just smiled and nodded. But really. Really? I decided to get the laughter over with then, because in a few weeks when I remind them of what they said they'll be laughing (albeit wearily) too.

There's a certain amount of denial involved. For instance, before the arrival of Little Man, Hubby thought that I would be content to let him sleep through the night while I was up three and four times in the darkness to nurse and diaper. Luckily this expectation didn't really set in until a week later when it was time for him to return to work. The illusion collapsed into powder within two nights of him supposedly returning back to his normal schedule, when I walked into the room with a screaming baby in my arms, growling, "Get up!! It's so freaking hot in here,** you have to hold him and change him while I go climb in the freezer!" Now I'm so incredibly lucky. On the off chance that our toddler wakes up in the middle of the night, Hubby is on it before I can even roll over! Oh how I have him trained! {Insert evil cackle here}

I take back the evil cackle, though. Sometimes I'm a little sad about that, because LM has hit the "I only want Daddy and I only want him NOW" phase of toddlerhood (is it just a short phase? someone please fill me in here!). Last night around 11pm we heard this forlorn sobbing on the monitor, with "Da da! Da da! Daaaaaaaa d-d-d-daaaaaah!" peppered in between breaths. I almost started sobbing back! As soon as Hubby went into the room the sobbing stopped. The mornings have also become increasingly difficult because when Hubby heads to work I have to do a complete 10 minute song and dance to get LM to stop crying and asking for Da Da to come back.

These guys are in for it. It will only take a couple of days, and they will be wrapped around those children's little tiny twinkle toes, and I can't wait to hear those quotes edited!

*Yes, you read correctly, and ice luge. I swear there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for a bunch of 30-somethings taking shots off of a block of ice... I just don't have it on me at the moment.

**Gotta love post-partum hot flashes!

Pea Pie, Columbia!

2008-04-05T00:40:00.003-04:00

Is it possible? Can I keep up with two blogs at once? You forget that I am Supermom (cough, gag, ahem...)! I can do anything! ... and I'm no longer employed outside the home, and I have to find at least one way in my life to be able to finish a sentence!

Pea Pie, Columbia would be the phoenix rising from the ashes of PalmettoTot, which I do admit was a tad bit disorganized, but that is simply due to the fact that I hadn't yet set the focus correctly. So, please check out the website, and if you were looking for something fun to do this weekend, I hope it will help!

Positive energy and a babushka!

2008-03-26T00:45:00.005-04:00

I was just reading over some past posts and realized I've been a tad bit negative lately. In a moment of truth here, that is something that I have been working on a lot. Who likes to waste energy being negative? There are so many better things that can be done with positive energy.

Last night one of my fabulous, artsy friends had one of her fabulous, artsy parties. This provided me the opportunity to dress up and pretend to be the fabulous, artsy girl that I once was. It was a reception for a very talented local classical guitarist. I didn't make the preceding concert... neither did my brother, mother, or father, who were also in attendance, but it was a nice party, which, in all honesty, is why we went. My excuse, at least was that the artist had crashed my baby shower that the hostess had thrown before Little Man was born, so I could crash his reception even though I hadn't gone to the concert. Not that either of us were unwelcome at either event!

My brother, who has two children of his own, got into a conversation with one of the maestro's students, a Russian woman who was gushing about him (rightfully so) and how she has learned so much, and now she is trying to pass this love of music down to her ten year old son, with some difficulty. My brother, whose son is fifteen (yikes!), assured her that boys do get easier as they mature, especially with the right doses of encouragement and discipline.

She responded with: "Oh, thank you! That is so good to hear! My son plays piano and he is giving us such a problem with it! I try to encourage him and he practices every day and I stand behind him and encourage him to get his notes and scales correct and when he doesn't I have a special slipper and I whop him on the head with it!"

This exchange happened as she was leaving, luckily, because my brother and I could barely contain ourselves. We just nodded silently and tried not to choke on our champagne (actually, he did choke on his champagne a little). As soon as she was out the door we unraveled our laughter as we pictured this poor little Americanized Russian kid glaring at his mother angrily as she hovered over him like an Iron Curtain babushka lady with a fuzzy bunny slipper in her hand.

Anywho... I got two posts out in one week! Woo hoo!

Surviving Easter

2008-03-25T08:19:00.005-04:00

I haven't forgotten that I have a blog... I just haven't felt interesting enough to write anything lately. Things have been pretty routine around here, and with Little Man on spring break from Mother's Morning Out this week, I spent the time I would normally write last week filling my MomAgenda with activities suitable for an 18 month old.

Our family has (barely) survived yet another holiday living in close proximity to both sides of relatives. Every time a holiday nears I look at Hubby and tap my foot and say "We need to decide what we are doing for (circle one: Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Mother's Day) before it is decided for us." Then, because after a couple of unsuccessful attempts to doing our own thing in the past, we suddenly lack the gumption to just tell our families that no, we are NOT driving all over the damn state all day to see everyone just for the three of us to be tired and miserable by 5:30. This year's odyssey was just disastrous enough for us to grow some balls and declare that we just can't please everyone, so get the hell over it.*

We managed to get a tiny bit of "our own thing" in this year by going to church. My sister-in-law decided that she wanted to join us, and was so late that I had to sit alone for most of the service because Hubby, Little Man and I were only 15 minutes early, which at Easter does not constitute being able to sit in a real seat, so we were forced to sit in the side chapel, who's entrance was blocked by the holidays-only brass ensemble. Hubby had to get up just before the processional to find his sister, thereby getting stuck in a totally different part of the church. Then, Little Man and my nephew embarked on an adorable little Easter Egg hunt in the churchyard, then happily covered themselves in blue cookie icing before we left. Once home, I cooked ONE asparagus casserole (the number one being accentuated because I have declared that I will NEVER make asparagus casserole for my vegetable-averse parents and brother again... Hubby then tries to eat it all and has to pop a Pepcid). I'll add the recipe below. Personally, I think it's yummylicious, and it's the one recipe adapted from Hubby's grandmother that the inlaws enjoy.

After awakening from his nap with a muffled "Ma? Dat?", Little Man was ready to head to his great-Grammy's for another Easter Egg Hunt (this time he abandoned it early to check out the tires on a nearby SUV) that was about 30 minutes away, then headed down to my parents' house which was yet another 55 minutes from that location.

We arrived at my parents' at the prescribed time only to learn that my brother and his new girlfriend hadn't even left their house yet (back in the town we started in), and then dinner wasn't even on the table until 8:00. Little Man goes to bed at 7:00 on the dot every night because he has inherited his grandmother's persnicketyness combined with my insanity for scheduling. Those qualities also make it impossible to put Little Man down anywhere but his crib (thankfully we've been lucky thus far when it comes to hotel rooms!). Hubby and I both tried in vain to get Little Man to go to sleep in his Pack N' Play upstairs, but it just wasn't happening. So, in order to actually eat, we let him sit at the table with us for dinner, during which he screamed and fussed and cursed us out for allowing him to be away from his domain at his bedtime. Had we planned to still be at my parents' at this hour? Hell no! Had my mother? Definitely!

We finally got home and transferred the finally sleeping Little Man to his crib and plopped onto the sofa to toast each other with a Red Stripe (we were somehow out of wine... the holidays will do that to you!) and retire. Simple, right? 11:55pm brought terrified screaming from a little boy who realized that he wasn't in the same place as when he went to sleep (in the car). 1:30 brought the same scream. As did 2:30 and 3:30.

What's the next holiday? Memorial Day? That one's easy because it is also our anniversary, so we can usually get away with blasting out of town unnoticed. What's next, July 4th? I think I hear the beach calling (yes, the inlaws even fight over us for Independence Day!). I'm also dreaming of St. Barth's for Christmas. Anyone have a few plane tickets to donate to the Save Shani's Sanity Fund?

Asparagus Casserole

6 boiled and sliced eggs

1 bunch of steamed asparagus

1 large (family-sized) can Cream of Mushroom soup

1 sleeve Ritz crackers

3 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese

1 stick butter or margarine**

Preheat oven to 350. In a properly greased casserole dish, place one layer of crackers, then half the asparagus, then three sliced eggs, then half the Cream of Mushroom soup. Repeat with subsequent layers of each (crackers, asparagus, eggs, soup). Cover the top with cheese and place stick of butter or margarine on top. Cover. Bake for 30 minutes. Set oven to broil at highest setting (500 degrees) and remove top of casserole dish. Let broil for 5 minutes to brown the cheese. C'est magnifique!

*I do love family, don't get me wrong.

**Personally, I prefer to use organic butter when I cook because our brains do need some fat to operate properly, and I tend to keep the rest of my family's meals pretty low in fat. If you do go with butter for this recipe, be prepared to sop some grease off of the top with paper towels.

Post-modernist crap, and where has all the basil gone?

2008-03-04T14:55:00.000-05:00

Once Little Man finally fell asleep after jabbering, pacing, and whining pathetically in his crib for 45 minutes today, I did a few chores and started working on a current project. It's the kind of rainy day outside that is perfect for napping and sketching out projects in a happy mood. I love those days until about 4:30, when Little Man is about to jump out of his skin and really needs to be set loose to toddle and run around on his tippy-toes out in the open. If it is still raining at this point, LM, the dogs and I are usually all on the verge of a nervous breakdown from the unreleased energy flowing through the house, and Hubby usually comes home to find me waiting for him to arrive so I can justifiably open some wine (or whine?) while cook dinner!

Well, today, as we have not yet reached the unreleased nervous energy phase of our day, I decided to have some nice music on in the background while I sketched. I opened AOL Radio on my computer and decided that the XM 20th Century classical station would be just right. About 20 minutes into sketching, I felt as if I was going to start twitching all up and down my neck and wrists, and had to take a break. 10 minutes into starting back, it happened again, and I found myself wondering, "Why is the neighbor's yard man just standing there clanging his tools together? And why the hell is he doing it while it's raining outside?" Then I realized it was the awful music I was listening to. Do people really sit in a concert hall to listen to this crap? I didn't look to see who the composer was, but it was absolutely post-modernism taken waaaaaaaay to far, and I was about to have a freaking seizure trying to work while listening to an obvious attempt to make a piece sound as ugly and obnoxious as possible. I'm sure the composer has some deep explanation like, "This work represents the defragmentation of our society as it turns to dog crap for becoming obsessed with Starbucks and technology." As one of those guilty of of becoming obsessed with both Starbucks and technological gadgets, I felt compelled to turn the junk off.

When I sat down here to write, I realized that I hadn't started my roast that Hubby has been begging for the last three days. It's so easy to do, really, as long as a Crock Pot is involved, but if it hasn't been started by 1pm, you are just up the damn creek with a twig for a paddle. I thought I could make up for it with some Italian macaroni and cheese that I ripped off from my least favorite Food Network celebrity, Rachel Ray (sorry, but anyone who dismisses that skills, training, and chemistry that are necessary to create the perfect gastronomical blend is NOT on my fave list), but then I remembered that yesterday I went to three different stores looking for fresh basil, and came up empty. Did someone in town make a run on basil? If so, please let me know. I need some basil very badly.

Anyway, thought I'd share the recipes for both dishes that I won't be serving tonight.

Crock Pot Roast:

Beef Pot Roast

4 Yukon Gold Potatoes

1 bag of baby carrots

1 large sweet onion

1 can tomato soup

1 package slices portobello mushrooms

2 bay leaves

1/2 bottle of beer

Salt and pepper to taste

Peel and quarter potatoes, rinse carrots and mushrooms, chop onion and place in crock pot with one bay leaf. Salt and pepper both sides of roast and lay on top of the vegetables. Pour tomato soup and 1/2 bottle of beer beer (and feel free to drink the other half so that it does not go to waste!) over top of roast. Place other bay leaf on top. Cook on high for 6 hours or low for 8 hours. When finished, beef will easily break up with a spoon as you stir the mixture. Serve with or over biscuits fresh from the oven!

For Rachel Ray recipe, click here.

A Nasty Day Changed My Bad Attitude

2008-02-23T08:33:00.001-05:00

Thurday I just had a really bad day. I won't bore you with many details, but let's just say that it started off with Little Man going into hysterics any time I moved more than 3 feet away from him and ended with me coming home from an event seriously needing a hug and a glass of wine but instead finding Hubby completely so engrossed in Letters From Iwo Jima that he didn't even notice I was there. What happened in between was just... a really... bad... day.

To top things off, I woke up yesterday morning with a skull splitting headache to find it cold and nasty outside, with no end in sight! Gee, I wasn't a crabby bitch or anything, I swear!

After coffee, I killed my plans to take Little Man to the art museum to see the Egyptian exhibition, and decided that we weren't going to change out of our jammies just yet. The next thing I knew, we were dancing to Thunder, currently Little Man's favorite song. Then, we were chasing each other around the house. Next, we were playing catch with his favorite ball. All of a sudden it was lunch and nap time! The rest of the day continued in this manner, with us reading together, scribbling together, and the two of us drinking hot chocolate together at 4pm, yes, still in our jammies. I hadn't been in such a good mood all week! Of course, when the UPS man came by I realized that we had better get dressed before Hubby arrived. I have a hard enough time keeping him convinced of the virtues of full time housewifeliness, we had to make it appear as if we had just had a normal, full day! :)

Headache? What headache? Hubby almost fell out when he came home to find me smiling after not having left the house once all day!

Quite possible the most disgusting recipe ever

2008-02-16T23:19:00.001-05:00

I just found this as I was cleaning the kitchen and had to share. This was on the bottom half of a Gorton's fish sticks coupon that was laying on the top of the trash when I went to empty it.

Fish on a Log

Ingredients:

4 Gorton's Crunchy Golden Fish Sticks

1 can of process cheese spread

1 package pizza or original flavored fish shaped crackers

Directions:

Cook Gorton's Fish Sticks per instructions on package. Invert cheese can and squirt a line of cheese down each Gorton's Fish Stick. Place 4 fish shaped crackers on top of cheese and serve immediately.

All I can do is shudder.

Nina bombs

2008-02-16T19:28:00.000-05:00

It happens twice a year... in August and in February... our Pomeranian starts to molt. The rest of the year she has this luxurious, shiny black coat that she would never dare ruffle. But now, no. Twice a year these thick clumps drop off of her and three hours after vacuuming I'm jumping up and down in a rage because the family room, kitchen, and hall are littered with these inch-thick black hairballs. Normally, I would call the groomer or have Hubby break out the electric clippers, but, for the week I am a single mom and I just can't seem to get around to picking up the phone during business hours to make the call. As a result, I am vacuuming a minimum of three times a day, and by the time I can sit down long enough without getting distracted, it's 7pm and the doggie hair salon has been closed for hours.

Maybe I'll put up a sign:

FOR RENT. 2-week lease. Adorably prissy black Pomeranian. No papers. No age (road rescue dog). Dumb as a doorknob but loves cuddling in laps, chasing German Shepherds, and sleeping in laundry baskets instead of her plush specialty bed. Good with children but not other dogs. For more info call 803.555.5555.

Neglected Blog Moved!

2008-02-11T22:05:00.001-05:00

So yeah, this used to be called "PalmettoTots." Okay, so it isn't that I started a blog and forgot about it, I promise. I just realized that in order to actually keep up with every single children's sale around here, one needs not be a master procrastinator. So, while I will post the occasional sale announcement, just expect some musings and recipes at irregular intervals from now on!

In light of that, I have a confession. I'm actually looking forward to my dear Hubby leaving town tomorrow (sorry honey)! The three of us (hubby, tot, and I) were supposed to have all left for sunny California at 6:45 tomorrow morning. Well, the Little Man has been struggling with a head cold and an ear infection for so long that I told the receptionist at the pediatrician's office today that we were thinking about setting up a cot and keeping a copy of "Baby Signing Time" in the waiting room. I swear, when he finally gets over this thing he's going to go into withdrawl from not making an appearance there once per week! Anywho, in light of his cough and overall lugie throwing, we decided that Little Man and I will fly out to meet Hubby on Thursday, therefore leaving him to do those things that pay the bills in peace. While I realize that this current feeling may disappear by 6:49 tomorrow night, I'm really looking forward to having the house and baby all to myself for a couple of days. Something must be wrong with me. Really. Usually when Hubby walks in the door I all but shout "Thank God!" and usher him toward the bathroom with Little Man in his arms as I begin to clean up the high chair tray and start dreaming of the glass of wine I am going to have with my dinner. I never believed in "the witching hour" until Little Man hit about 14 months (i.e.- when he started walking). Now, 5:00 hits and his sudden burst of energy and my lack of energy make a rather loud collision that usually results in me fussing at the poor dogs a little more than I should. What on earth am I going to do when I'm pregnant with #2?

Could it be, though, that I'm relishing the thought of a couple of days filled with playdates, Valetine's cupcakes, and not cooking a full dinner? Little Man will fully appreciate a couple of gourmet meals of chicken nuggets or fish sticks with peas or edemame, some yummy fruit, and a nice tall sippy cup of whole milk. And I will fully appreciate a couple of nights of watching girly literature-based period movies and stinky cheese and a glass or two of wine.

I've lost it, haven't I?

2008-02-11T22:05:00.000-05:00